Yes I am her mother, No I am not the F*&$ing Nanny!!!

Okay so since my daughter was born I have been constantly asked , like once a month if I am her nanny?! Does this happen to you guys too?  I want to bitch slap people when they ask me, I want to scream at the top of my lungs and say NO I AM HER MOTHER!!!!

The first time it happened I was in the kids section of Barnes and Noble, I was playing with her, speaking to her in Spanish and a nanny asked me how long I had been watching her. I felt my back shoulders tighten up, my whole body got really hot and I said, no, I am her mother to which she replied oh, well she is very pretty. For the rest of the day, it really bothered me, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. All of my insecurities came up, did my daughter not look like me? Did I look like a hott mess that someone would think that I was the nanny, was it because I was speaking in Spanish, etc. Then I realized just because I looked like crap wearing my faded leggings, UGG boots and tee shirt didn’t justify someone thinking I was her nanny. Maybe it was more real than that, I mean how many people in my neck of the woods can really stay home with their kids, the world we live in is crazy and most people have to go out and work or want to get back to their career after giving birth. Most of the kids these days have nanny’s or go to some sort of daycare and in the Tristate area many moms who don’t work outside of the home still have a nanny of some sort. And if I did look like the nanny who cares? Nanny’s don’t all look a certain way, especially in Connecticut, some Nanny’s I see look great even if they are with the kids at the park or wherever; they are wearing a full face of makeup, have nice jewelry on and cute clothes! Why was I offended?

I still can’t really pinpoint why it bothers me so much but it does. I mean I was at the dentist last week with my daughter and the dental hygienist asked if I was her mother. I had an instant Ally McBeal moment where I daydreamed that I stood up and yelled in her face YES I am her MOTHER!! What is it with people constantly thinking I am my kid’s nanny. Is it because my last name is Perez or because I clearly look “ethnic” or is it because I speak to my kids in Spanish. Does society not think that someone like myself could afford to stay home with her kids or is more simple than that, there are not that many of us Stay at Home Moms these days? I am sure it is just a combination of things. The bottom line is that I want to get to a place where I simply do not care.



  1. Everytime I’m out with my friend and her children, people think they children are mine and that she is the Nanny. It used to upset her but now we just laugh. Her kids are super Irish looking and she is very dark Italian. People are just stupid. I wouldn’t sweat it too much.

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